ES Preview: Spartans host the Chippewas

Fire Up Chips????  Indeed.

#21 Michigan State Spartans (2-1, 1-0) vs Central Michigan Chippewas (1-3)
Spartan Stadium
September 29, 2018.  12 noon
Fox Sports 1

Weather:  58 and sunny

Sagarin Ratings:  MSU #15, CMU #122

Line:  MSU by 29

Can we run the fucking ball?  We'll do it all day long today.  I hate the damn Chips.  We're going to obliterate these bastards.

Picks:

Kat:  MSU 42-10
Carter:  MSU 45-10. I predicted the ASU game and got the 14 point spread in the IU game...CMU is 1-3....so being the point spread is 29...
CHock: MSU 35-13
Bob:  MSU 27-10.  No o-line. No run game. MSU ranks 112th in the nation rushing.
RGM3:  MSU 31-7
Big Joe and Phantom 309:  MSU 35-6 and I'm tailgating
Gregger:  MSU 45-7
Skooz:  MSU 42-10
Lex: we gonna woop their ass; destroy the city.

ES sez:  MSU 56-7

ES Preview: Spartans at Hoosiers

Really?  Hoosier pride in the kitchen!

#24 Michigan State Spartans
(1-1, 0-0) at
Indiana Hoosiers (3-0, 0-0)
Sept. 22, 2018.  7:30 pm.
TV:  Big Ten Network.
Memorial Stadium, Bloomington, IN.

Weather:  64, cloudy, no wind.  Good passing weather.

Sagarin Ratings:  MSU #22, Indiana #55.

Line out of Vegas:  MSU by 5.

How did we get here?

Well, whaddya know.  Here are our Spartans in the middle of September, having played just one game at home and looking like crap in both games.  This underwhelming team's biggest deficiency has reared its ugly head, that being the Offensive Line... which is more like the Maginot Line.  In two games, and specifically in the loss to Arizona State, the left side of that offensive line had no push, and no protection for Brian Lewerke.   We certainly miss Cole Chewins on the left side of that line.   LJ Scott hasn't been much of a help, either.  If the Maginot Line has been poor, then Scott's protection for Lewerke has been poorerer.  Oh yeah, he's a running back.  Well, his running has been just as poor - in the first two games, he's dancing like Justin Timberlake instead of running like Jim Brown: just 103 yards and averaging 3.4 yards per carry against powerhouses Utah State and Arizona State.  And on the other side of the ball?  Let's be honest, the defense was LUCKY against Arizona State, as their QB overthrew pass after pass after pass after pass... and finally  connected on the last drive when MSU DBs had to make a stop.  Bend bend bend break!  Just too many mental mistakes, too many opportunities lost (e.g. Lewerke INT in the endzone) - mistakes do not make a mark of a good team.

So, now Indiana?

The Hoosier nation is in constant desire of football mediocrity.  Indiana is 3-0, again.  So, expect another 5-7 season out of the Hoosiers... unless they find a way to trip up our Spartans.

Make note of the Little Pink House on the Indiana Campus.   Yes, it's pink. 

Stat chat

Well... other than MSU's run defense... well.... offense averaging 114 yards on the ground per game???  Screw that, who are we?

MSU has won 16 of the last 20 against Indiana... and 7 of the last 10 played at Indiana.  Doesn't matter much, unless you are considering this against expectations.

Pix:

Kat:  MSU 30-17
Smig:  MSU 32-26
Carter:  MSU 24-10
CHock:  MSU 24-23
Keith:   MSU 35-32. "trap game."
Dr. Tom:  MSU 24-7. "This has become infinitely harder after ASU game… Honestly they could rebound and drop a bomb on Indiana or continue to look like a bag of hot dicks. And their o-line looks like such a piece of shit I don’t even know. I think we win 24-13 because Lewerke takes over the game. Wait. 24-7. Dantonio is pissed."
GR Gregger:  MSU 38-20
Big Joe and Phantom 309: MSU 24-22
RGM3: MSU 31-10.

ES sez:  MSU 21,  John Cougar Mellencamp 17.  

Make White Trash Great Again! NOT!!!! GO BIG GREEN

Michigan State (2-0, 0-0) vs. Notre Dame (2-1, 0-0)

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #27, Potatoes #16

September 21, 2017.  8:00 ET

Spartan Stadium

East Lansing, MI

Weather:  80 sunny & warm

TV:  Fox

Line: ND favored by 3-1/2

Depth Charts:  MSU, ND

Thy shall loathe thine Irish.  As chimed by Shane MacGowan and his Pogues:

And Brian Kelly never had it so good

"We had one million bales of the best Sligo rags
We had two million barrels of stones
We had three million sides of old blind horses hides,
We had four million barrels of bones.
We had five million hogs, we had six million dogs,
Seven million barrels of porter.
We had eight million bails of old nanny goats' tails,
In the hold of the Irish Rover.

There was awl Mickey Coote who played hard on his flute
When the ladies lined up for his set
He was tootin' with skill for each sparkling quadrille
Though the dancers were fluther'd and bet
With his sparse witty talk he was cock of the walk
As he rolled the dames under and over
They all knew at a glance when he took up his stance
And he sailed in the Irish Rover"

So, the halftime show for the MSU-ND game is... the Pogues!  For the first time in recent memory, Michigan State University has decided to hand over its halftime festivities to the trovelling band, The Pogues - in honor of our Irish guests.   So, with a spoonful of sugar, and a pint of Guinness, let's break down the realities of Saturday:

• Lewerke's name (MSU QB) is not Irish.  Actually, after spending 25 minutes in The Riv trying to figure it out... I have no idea where the hell he is from - other than it ain't Asia.  But he will live a long time, pending any issues with a bus or train: 
• So, here's a nice pic of South Bend, home of Notre Dame University (below).  It explains everything.  Crappy town, it is near (or in) the home of the National RV Hall of Fame!!!  I wonder what their role is in Hurricanes Harvey, Irma, Maria, etc?  Using a Donald-ism "we will be the GREATEST WHITE TRASH ON EARTH!  MAKE WHITE TRASH GREAT AGAIN!" 

• And, on and on we go.  Here's some predictions:

Predictions:

• RGM3: 28-24 ND
• Greg (go back to GVSU homie): 35-24 ND 
• Joe (from the Italian Stallion who got laid today on snapchat):  28-17 MSU 
• Brock: 28-24 MSU
• Leslie (hottie from Riv): 21-17 MSU
• Deb Chang (hottie from MSU HALE): 24-20 MSU
• Matt (from Iowa): 23-20 ND
• Keith: 24-23 ND
• Paul (Australia): 23-17 MSU
• Kelly (Butt :): 27-24 MSU
• ES sez: MSU QB Lewerke underrated, ND overrated (each year).  No Fly Zone back in play... Home, 80 degrees with humidity. On natural turf.  Picking out 4-leaf clovers.  Dear Sweet Jesus...It's simple.  MSU 23, ND 21. 

ES Preview: Spartans to Buck the Broncs or Play Patty-cake?

Time for some Kentucky Fried Horse on Saturday

Michigan State (1-0, 0-0) vs. Western Michigan (0-1, 0-0)

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #32, WMU #68

September 9, 2017.  3:30 ET

Spartan Stadium

East Lansing, MI

Weather:  65 sunny

TV:  Big Ten Network

Line:  MSU favored by 7-1/2

Depth Charts:  MSU, WMU

WEAR WHITE ON SATURDAY!!!!  The Spartan gridders will be sporting an all-white uniform, including a white helmet (first time with a white helmet at home since 1954???? In 1954, MSU was 3-6 overall, 1-5 Big Ten with victories over Indiana, Washington State, and Marquette.  Ahem!) 

Predictions:  

• Big Bob, WMU 31-28.  Did you see the wmu-usc game?  MSU will get its ass kicked if it can't stop fumbling.  WMU 31-MSU 28. Sorry to rain on yer parade but, remember, Bob Wills is still the king regardless of the outcome.


• Sloth, MSU.  I predict LJ Scott will fumble away 2 TD's.  Malik McDowell will show up on an ATV and limp around on the sidelines all game, same as he did last season.  The good news is that WMU is less than great on defense, our biggest defensive weakness is pass coverage and WMU is less than great in the passing game.  So long as we keep WMU to less than 150 yards rushing, State wins this game going away.  Otherwise, it will be a loooooooooong Saturday afternoon and it will feel like 1983 all over again.
  
• RGM3: 24-21 msu. Game winning fg
  
• Ronnie: 28-17 bog green

Chew 'em up, Cole!

• ES sez:  Did anyone see LJ Scott this week around campus?  Was he carrying pigskin to class?  Was he going to class?  
  
  Well, the ES met Cole Chewins (OL, 6-8, 284) today at the Mark Dantonio show at Reno’s East.  ES said, “Damn, you are tall!  Go get ‘em buddy.”  Good kid. Coach D said he came MSU at 232 pounds - so he added 52 pounds in 2 years!  Chewins said all he does in eat (he’s CHEWIN!) all day long, and in class, etc.  Hopefully, Lewerke doesn’t hit him in the back of the head with some passes.   More impressively?  He’s a Finance major.  Nice, the ES could use him come tax season...  
  
  Dantonio provided his usual coaching insight, blah blah blah, that you or I or any other person who watches football could say in their sleep:  “We will need to keep on our toes.  They have an athletic, mobile quarterback with dangerous running backs.”  As if the stats don’t lie with the Broncos’ performance vs Southern Cal.  The problem is what coach D also said, in response to a question from a caller: “one of our goals on defense is to create turnovers. When we win the turnover battle we are 52-9, when we don’t we are 25-25 in our 10 years here.”  Well, Big Green had a pick-six vs Bowling Green, but gave up three turnovers to lose the TO battle at -2.  This must change.  

Roly Poly... Average age & weight in attendance at the MD show at Reno's?  78 y/o and 295.

Problem with WMU is their defense gave up over 280 yards to 10 receivers from SC.  Now, the Spartans don’t have the depth at receiver as do da Trojans… but the Big Green better figure it out.  While MSU hit 10 receivers last week (as did SC), only five had more than one catch, and, the ES is noting several drops.  Derrell Stewart (impressive) and Felton Davis (acrobatic despite drops) seem to be the go-tos to take advantage of a weak WMU secondary.

Enuff said.  Methinks the Spartans, with Hartbarger, at worst can punt MSU into good field position on the day.  Stop fumbling!  Any field goal kicking?  Naah.  Move to 2-0 and next week bring on the Firkin Irish stumbling into EL with their bruises after a loss to UGA.

FINAL SCORE: Chewin' Finance Major 35, Dangerous Running Backs with No Secondary 28.

OMG! Greatest win in the most dramatic, exciting Spartan game ever!

More updates here shortly, but the ES is ecstatic!!!  What an amazing victory for Michigan State over the hated Bucky Badgers - MSU deserved to win the game with a pounding defensive effort, and the miracle Hail Mary (that never works).   Michigan State is a top 10 team easily...

Will update more - ES is traveling to Washington DC.  GO STATE! What an amazing day to be a Spartan!

Michigan State to the PROMISED LAND in 2013: ES Predictions

What does the ES predict?  Sure, at best we can clean the slate and go to the PROMISED LAND.  At worst, the Big Green will still be a Touchdown Machine in 2011.  Many are predicting it could be the Doctor's best team... but with the toughest schedule.  It is TOUGH to predict as many last minute wins as last year, or as my buddy Paul says, I can predict the 2011 Spartans will be  "Probably the Greatest Team in the History of Football."  Of course, to help its cause, MSU has joined the list of woosies, like Michigan, who are scheduling DOWN for a guarantee win to secure bowl eligibility (Appalachian State withstanding).  Youngstown State tops the schedule.  Harumph.  If it was the greatest team ever, would we need to schedule YSU, or should we instead schedule top tiered BCS-conference teams?  Regardless of our status, the ES thinks the latter... schedule up, take our lumps, and DOMINATE.  You don't know until you try.

That said, let's predict the '11 slate...

• 9/2. Youngstown State.  MSU 52-10. YSU graduated the cheatin' sweater to OSU, and YSU has never been the same since; they are clean, but stink. YSU wuz 3-8 last year.  MSU 1-0.
• 9/10. Florida Atlantic.  MSU 37-17. Who scheduled this matchup? It's been ugly: a torrential downpour and 250 yards out of Ringer in '09, a 3/4 empty stadium in Detroit in '10, and... a four-sack effort out of Worthy in '11. MSU 2-0.
• 9/17.  at Notre Dame.  MSU 29-28.  With no time remaining on the clock, Dantonio pulls the Hook-and-Lateral: Cousins-to-Cunningham-to a trailing-Baker. And, instead of the XP, Sparty goes for two, and runs the Statue of Liberty with LeVeon Bell for the conversion and win.  ND coach Kelly says, "Holy Shamrocks!  I seen this before!" Fools gold, MSU wins. MSU 3-0.
• 9/14. CMU. MSU 38-14.  This ain't your Kelly or Davis Chips.  This is your Enos Chips.  These guys are a question mark in 2011: but, if it takes a penalty on a last second 4th-down touchdown pass, a botched onsides kick, and another penalty to recoup from a missed FG as time expires... on the best team you ever had... well, should be no problem this year. Since that debacle in 2009, MSU is up, and CMU is down.  Would be nice to be a good game, but it won't.  MSU 4-0.
• 10/1.  at Ohio State.  MSU 27-21. Tressell returns, only to show up in the locker room, carrying $100 bills and shoving them down the pants of the players.  "Hey coach, we're running out onto the field! Pay us later!" "No worries, it's all about values -- go WIN and keep the greenbacks."  The Buckeyes will turn green, from the Spartan Touchdown Machine and Edwin Baker, who amasses 150 yards and a pair of TDs on the ground.  MSU 5-0.
• 10/15. MICHIGAN.   MSU 34-28.  A battle between the Peanut Barrel and the Blimpy Burger ensues. Todd Blackledge is judge.  The Blimps throw one of their 2.1 billion combinations at Todd, the Barrel throws one of their 8 combinations at Todd -- and, like any scientist, figures out that simpler IS better (remember, E=mc2)?  The Barrel, Todd, and Spartans win in resounding fashion (despite a late throw away-TD for scUM).  MSU 6-0.
• 10/22. WISCONSIN.  UW 31-24.   The longest Spartan winning streak at home (11 games through 10/15) since the era of Bubba Smith comes to a close with a Badger retribution from last year.  The ES is no fan of the stinking Badgers and Bielema, but MSU can't win at home forever...  MSU 6-1.
• 10/29. at Nebraska.  MSU 29-27.  Dan Conroy for President:  he kicks five field goals, including the game winner as time expires.  Welcome to the Big Ten, Corn Men.  MSU 7-1.
• 11/5.  MINNESOTA. MSU 37-24.  Minnesota limps into Spartan Stadium, with new coach Jerry Kill announcing that both it and Indiana will leave the Big Ten and instead join North Dakota and South Dakota in the Great West Conference.  The Big Ten will return to 10, the planets will align, and the world of sports will sing in harmony.  MSU 8-1.
• 11/12.  at Iowa.  MSU 23-21. Local residents learn in horror as KFC announces it has fried up Iowa's ugly duckling mascot.  Pieces of polyester and cotton are found in over 100 chicken baskets across Iowa City.  Upon questioning, it is learned the local franchise owner is a Spartan loyalist.  MSU 9-1.
• 11/19. INDIANA.  MSU 42-17. New Indiana head coach Kevin Wilson, noting his team's 0-10 start, announces just prior to the Spartan game that, it won't join Minnesota in the Great West Conference.  Instead it is moving to Division II, and joining the Great Lakes Intercollegiate Athletic Conference (GLIAC).  MSU 10-1.
• 11/26.  at Northwestern.  NW 72-66.   The highest scoring game in modern history comes to a close in sub-zero temperatures in suburban Chicago.  Persa throws for 700 yards, Cousins for 600, and the game lasts for six hours, and 5 OTs.  Persa gets the better of Cousins, but doesn't spoil Sparty's trip to the Big Ten title game, as it wins the Legends Division with a 6-2/4-1 mark.  MSU 10-2.
• 12/3.  vs. Wisconsin, Big Ten Title Game.  MSU 24-23.  Captain Kirk leads a last second drive to score a TD and take the Big Ten crow, with Sparty defeating Wisky when it really matters, at the Big Ten championship...  As Freddy Kreuger would say... "What a RUSH!"  MSU 11-2

OK, so there you have it, 11-2/6-2/4-1 record.  On paper, Michigan State should be as good as any team in the conference.  Maybe they beat Northwestern but lose at Nebraska; Maybe they lose to Wisconsin, Ohio State, Nebraska, and Iowa.  OK.  But, the ES hopes he is wrong, and that the Big Green can win their entire slate at home  for a second consecutive year, especially with wins at Nebraska and Ohio State.  The NW game is tricky, that team has really spellbound the Spartans in recent years.  But, a shoot-out seems realistic.  The ES will take 11-2... but 13-0 seems a whole lot more fun.  And, just making it to the Big Ten title game would be FANTASTIC. 

See you in Spartan Stadium on Friday evening.  Go SPARTANS!