ES Preview: MSU Bubba Smith hosts PVAM Kenny Houston

Michigan State Spartans (2-0) host Prairie View A&M Panthers (1-1)
September 14, 2024.  3:30 pm.
Spartan Stadium, East Lansing, MI
TV: BTN

Weather: hot, 85 and sunny, no wind. 
Sagarin Ratings: MSU #74, Prairie View #234
Line Outta Vegas (via LSJ): MSU by 41 points with an O/U of 10-1/2.  So, the prediction would be MSU to win by at least 40-10. 

Who is the most famous Prairie View alumni?  I googled it, and remember Ken Houston, who played both for the Houston Oilers and (as I remember watching him) for the Washington Redskins.  He was one of the first lock-down corners as I remember, and he dominated the NFL for about a decade years (named to the Pro Bowl 12 times). 

Here's Kenny Houston, tackling Walter Payton.  PVAM don't have him today.

Not much about this game.  It's a B1G vs a HBCU in FCS.  The Big Green Touchdown Machine was originally scheduled to play Louisiana-Lafayette, but replaced it with PVAM for $500,000.  The Spartans better win.

MSU's plan?  Just stay healthy.  MSU travels to Boston College (#58 in Sagarin) next week, and BC really is an unknown, other than they can run the ball like crazy and beat a terrible Florida State team in Tallahassee.  So, stay healthy, win, and move on.  Maybe Adian Chiles can work on his footwork and we can just run the ball.  Lots of Gatorade in the heat today.

Prognostications:

Big Bob: MSU 34-17
Pontiac Keith: MSU 42-6
Uncle Denny: MSU 42-17
Australian Paul: 38-0 MSU. After the game, the opposing coach is found in the bathroom, curled up in the foetal position singing "you make me feel like a natural woman"
Doc: Win, but look like crap at times. Growing pains. MSU 31-16

ES sez:  MSU 38-10

Enlightened Preview: scUMbags eating Korn

Here's your scUM trailer trash, eating maize, while listening to Korn. 
And who's the starting QB for scUM? O'Korn.  Cornrolls, eating corn, listening to Korn, rooting for O'Korn.  Is there a God to help us from this madness?  

Michigan State (3-1, 1-0) vs. #7 scUMbags (4-0, 1-0)

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #27, scUM #13

October 5, 2017.  7:30 ET/Fox

Michigan Stadium
Ann Arbor, MI

Weather: 76, cloudy, 18 mph wind SSW

TV:  Fox

Line: scUM favored by 10-1/2

It's great for the ES to be flat, dead wrong.  ES picked a tank job against Iowa, and was proven wrong... as we needed only one week to prepare, and with a stout defense, win 17-10 against the Ugly Chickens of Iowa, not the two weeks necessary to be drubbed by the Irish.

OK, here I am with Big Bob and Don Middlebrook at Reno's reliving shitty weather games in our lives.  Thinking of the rain and wind this weekend in Khakiville leads to weather remembrance (in no ranking order) before we get to the predictions:

• MSU hosting Florida Atlantic (2008).  Absolute pouring down rain, like the God opened up a firehose on Spartan Stadium.  It lasted ALL GAME LONG.  Bob and I were shivering, and it was 72 degrees outside.  There was no wind, the rain just came straight down, like a 4-hour shower.  QB from FAU tried to throw the ball, and the rain knocked it down.  Javon Ringer for MSU ran for 250+ yards, because there was nothing else to do. Hardest rainstorm I've ever experienced in my life.  
• MSU hosting Northwestern (1989).  The Big Green clobbered Northwestern, 76-14 in EL.  The snow just DID NOT STOP.  Late November. Big Bob recalls the sweepers on the field after every possession to mark each 5 yards.  The ES remembers the student section throwing snowballs at the back of the NW players, and the PA announcer stating "please do not throw snowballs, you are endangering the players" as play was stopped. 
• MSU at Illinois (2005).  Traveling to Illinois with ChiSpartan and Big Bob, when we arrived it was 98 degrees in late September.  And humid.  MSU roared out to a 61-7 lead in the middle of the third quarter, and Big Bob was yelling out "BELIEVE!!!!" (the Illinois phrase at the time) and the ES yelling "Get Zookified" (in reference to coach Ron Zook)!  But thousands of students at Illinois were wearing shirts that said "Ann Arbor is a Whore" and after the game dozens congratulated us, and begged us to beat scUM the next week.  
• MSU losing to ND (2006).  In the remnants of Hurricane Katrina, the ES & Co. watched the beginning of the downfall of John L Smith in the pouring rain.  It's pouring rain and 40+ mph wind... why run for 12 yards a carry when you can throw in a monsoon?!  The ultimate of stupidity.

Let's get to the game:

2017 scUM Homecoming Queen, a 3.95 GPA Nuclear Physics major

What does one think of when one considers Ann Arbor?  non-contiguous streets.  Hippie wanna-bees having pot-smoking festivals between splitting atoms.  Challenged drivers. Great bread, bad teeth, and bad hair.  Watching "Wolf of Wall Street" with grandpa and kids.  $40 parking on someone's lawn... without a refresher?  Bad seating.  Construction on non-contiguous streets.  Almost-greatness always.  Trailer residence in abundance - why attend there, when you can park there?

Furthermore, what does one do when you read the contract of the second wealthiest coach in the nation?  $4,000 khaki allowance. LOL.

'Enough.  MSU better offense vs UM great defense. UM average offense vs MSU good defense.  Seems even-steven to me.  Last to screw up, other team wins.

Predictions:

• Big Bob: MSU wins 19-16, with a safety in hand.
• RGM3: Heart says MSU, Brain said UM... Heart wins out. 21-20 MSU
• Sloth: 23-7, Goodguys.
• Australian Paul: MSU 38 - IOWA 0
• Debbie Does Texas:  MSU 21-17
• Big Joe and Phantom 309: two teams with good defenses and lacking offensive identities means we're in for a low scoring game, 10-9 MSU
• Feather: 27-24 scUM
• Don Middlebrook: A big Spartan fan, but I think it's a 24-20 Spartan loss... but we look good and next year we take 'em.
• Lax Kaatz: Both teams give the ball away, but scum don't capitalize while MSU does. 20-17 good guys.
• Oakland Ronnie: MSU 18-13
• Carter:  scUM 31, MSU 17
• Keith the Midget-man:  MSU 19-17
• Kelly Butt:  MSU 17-10

ES sez:  surprise, surprise, surprise!  Coach D is the comeback king pulling a few gadget plays out of his hat at the right time in a defensive-minded game.  Spartan Nation 18, Homecoming Queen 16.

Make White Trash Great Again! NOT!!!! GO BIG GREEN

Michigan State (2-0, 0-0) vs. Notre Dame (2-1, 0-0)

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #27, Potatoes #16

September 21, 2017.  8:00 ET

Spartan Stadium

East Lansing, MI

Weather:  80 sunny & warm

TV:  Fox

Line: ND favored by 3-1/2

Depth Charts:  MSU, ND

Thy shall loathe thine Irish.  As chimed by Shane MacGowan and his Pogues:

And Brian Kelly never had it so good

"We had one million bales of the best Sligo rags
We had two million barrels of stones
We had three million sides of old blind horses hides,
We had four million barrels of bones.
We had five million hogs, we had six million dogs,
Seven million barrels of porter.
We had eight million bails of old nanny goats' tails,
In the hold of the Irish Rover.

There was awl Mickey Coote who played hard on his flute
When the ladies lined up for his set
He was tootin' with skill for each sparkling quadrille
Though the dancers were fluther'd and bet
With his sparse witty talk he was cock of the walk
As he rolled the dames under and over
They all knew at a glance when he took up his stance
And he sailed in the Irish Rover"

So, the halftime show for the MSU-ND game is... the Pogues!  For the first time in recent memory, Michigan State University has decided to hand over its halftime festivities to the trovelling band, The Pogues - in honor of our Irish guests.   So, with a spoonful of sugar, and a pint of Guinness, let's break down the realities of Saturday:

• Lewerke's name (MSU QB) is not Irish.  Actually, after spending 25 minutes in The Riv trying to figure it out... I have no idea where the hell he is from - other than it ain't Asia.  But he will live a long time, pending any issues with a bus or train: 
• So, here's a nice pic of South Bend, home of Notre Dame University (below).  It explains everything.  Crappy town, it is near (or in) the home of the National RV Hall of Fame!!!  I wonder what their role is in Hurricanes Harvey, Irma, Maria, etc?  Using a Donald-ism "we will be the GREATEST WHITE TRASH ON EARTH!  MAKE WHITE TRASH GREAT AGAIN!" 

• And, on and on we go.  Here's some predictions:

Predictions:

• RGM3: 28-24 ND
• Greg (go back to GVSU homie): 35-24 ND 
• Joe (from the Italian Stallion who got laid today on snapchat):  28-17 MSU 
• Brock: 28-24 MSU
• Leslie (hottie from Riv): 21-17 MSU
• Deb Chang (hottie from MSU HALE): 24-20 MSU
• Matt (from Iowa): 23-20 ND
• Keith: 24-23 ND
• Paul (Australia): 23-17 MSU
• Kelly (Butt :): 27-24 MSU
• ES sez: MSU QB Lewerke underrated, ND overrated (each year).  No Fly Zone back in play... Home, 80 degrees with humidity. On natural turf.  Picking out 4-leaf clovers.  Dear Sweet Jesus...It's simple.  MSU 23, ND 21. 

Winning B1G is fun

YES!

There are few things better in life than a convincing win from your alma mater on the gridiron.  That was exactly the case yesterday, as our Big Green Touchdown Machine dispatched Bowling Green in easy, simple fashion.  The ES wuz surprised at how well the MSU defense played - and there were certainly some pluses and minuses.  

Looking to next week:  MSU is favored by a TD over Western. 

Beyond all of this - WOW - the B1G Ten (11-3 in week one) looks by far to have the best conference top to bottom in the land.  Maryland beating Texas… in Texas????  Who dominated in the Big Ten? Michigan State, Ohio State, Wisconsin, MARYLAND, Michigan, Penn State, Iowa. Even Purdon’t (loss to Louisville) hung around.  Wow. This was easily the greatest opening weekend of college football in what remains of my memory.  Big Ten schools that struggled: Nebraska, Northwestern, Illinois, Minny, and of course, Rutgers (loss).

A fairly full house on a beautiful Saturday for football!

Ahem.  Pretty!

The ES breaks down our win over Bowling Green:

Biggest surprise:  The defense.  Other than the bomb on BGSU’s first drive, the Spartan defense controlled the game.  First downs: MSU won the battle, 25-9. Only 9 FDs!  And, MSU gave up just 212 total yards, 67 on the ground - 2.8 average per carry.  The defense was stout - surprisingly very good.  

Best play: In the third quarter, with MSU up 21-3, LB Chris Frey busted around the right end, threw the tackle aside, and hit the BGSU quarterback straight up.  It was - WOW - a great, athletic play.  Almost a safety - that was when you knew the game was over.  

Biggest disappointment:  LJ Scott.  If Coach D doesn’t make LJ carry a football around campus all week - and sleep with it - then he should be fired.  Scott had a fumble on the one yard line - a NO-NO -and then BGSU’s only TD was off another Scott fumble.  That guy needs to get a GRIP.  He has too much talent to be afflicted with fumble-itis. 

Best stat: MSU 8-of-15 on third downs.  This was a real problem area for MSU all season last year.  No problem against BGSU - MSU looked comfortable on third downs for the balance of the game. 

Not on the bandwagon:  Felton Davis (#18) made some GREAT catches.  He also dropped a few.  He can’t drop those passes if we are going to beat Michigan or Ohio State.  You wanna keep those dreadlocks?  Fine, CATCH THE BALL. 

On the bandwagon:  Chris Frey (#23) and Jake Hartbarger (#2).  Frey was flying around the field (5 tackles), as the field general of the defense he looked good!  Harbarger punted a 57 yarder that had great hang-time… that can be a potential deadly weapon in tight games.  

Crowd:  It was 12 o’clock on a Saturday.  The regular crowd shuffled in. There was an old man sitting next to me.  Bitching about tonic and gin.  It was GREAT to see the usher (for 50+years) up in section 125, and of course, Dieter.   About 71,500+ - pretty good for Bowling Green.  

A comment from my Italian friend, Joe: “First half sloppy offense, too many fumbles, second half they pulled their shit together like I expected:” 

 Total Yards: 465-212, another Spartan victory.  Stats are what they are: 

Team Statistics (Final) 
The Automated ScoreBook 
Bowling Green vs Michigan State (Sep 2, 2017 at East Lansing, Mich.)

Team Totals	BGSU	MSU
FIRST DOWNS	9	25
Rushing	3	13
Passing	6	11
Penalty	0	1
NET YARDS RUSHING	67	215
Rushing Attempts	24	46
Average Per Rush	2.8	4.7
Rushing Touchdowns	0	1
Yards Gained Rushing	78	244
Yards Lost Rushing	11	29
NET YARDS PASSING	145	250
Completions-Attempts-Int	10-31-1	22-36-0
Average Per Attempt	4.7	6.9
Average Per Completion	14.5	11.4
Passing Touchdowns	0	3
TOTAL OFFENSE YARDS	212	465
Total offense plays	55	82
Average Gain Per Play	3.9	5.7
Fumbles: Number-Lost	0-0	4-3
Penalties: Number-Yards	4-20	4-25
PUNTS-YARDS	8-369	6-294
Average Yards Per Punt	46.1	49.0
Net Yards Per Punt	44.2	40.7
Inside 20	3	3
50+ Yards	2	3
Touchbacks	0	2
Fair catch	1	3
KICKOFFS-YARDS	3-161	6-367
Average Yards Per Kickoff	53.7	61.2
Net Yards Per Kickoff	34.0	41.5
Touchbacks	1	1
Punt returns: Number-Yards-TD	1-10-0	3-15-0
Average Per Return	10.0	5.0
Kickoff returns: Number-Yds-TD	5-93-0	2-34-0
Average Per Return	18.6	17.0
Interceptions: Number-Yds-TD	0-0-0	1-38-1
Fumble Returns: Number-Yds-TD	2-76-1	0-0-0
Miscellaneous Yards	0	0
Possession Time	21:59	38:01
1st Quarter	5:06	9:54
2nd Quarter	4:13	10:47
3rd Quarter	5:19	9:41
4th Quarter	7:21	7:39
Third-Down Conversions	2 of 13	8 of 15
Fourth-Down Conversions	0 of 2	0 of 0
Red-Zone Scores-Chances	1-1	4-5
Touchdowns	0-1	4-5
Field goals	1-1	0-5
Sacks By: Number-Yards	0-0	1-10
PAT Kicks	1-1	5-5
Field Goals	1-1	0-0
Points off turnovers	10	7

Michigan State vs Rutgers. TOILET SCUM BOWL.

Last week was the Toilet Bowl.  This week?  You know what happens after a sewage backup, and see all the SCUM - a.k.a. hair, pee, barf, & other crap within and around the edges?  That's this game.

MSU 2-7/0-6. Rutgers 2-7/0-6.
Sagarin Ratings: MSU #67, Rutgers #111

Saturday, November 12, 2016.
12:00 pm ET.
Spartan Stadium, East Lansing, MI
Weather: 45 degrees, sunny, 10 mph wins
TV: BTN.

Line: MSU by 14-1/2 (really?)

ES sez:  Rutgers 27-25
Norm (PB):  MSU 17-10
Skooz (PB):  MSU 35-24
Staci (PB): Rutgers W by 7
Brandy (hottie at the bar):  We lose
Lucas (dude at the bar): MSU 28-13
Brock:  Rutgers 26-21
Rick: MSU 35-21

#8 Michigan State hosts #11 Wisconsin: Cooking Up Badger Meat

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #28, Wisky #29

#8 MSU 2-0/0-0. #11 Wisky: 3-0
Saturday, September 24, 2016.
12:00 pm ET.
Mecca: Spartan Stadium, East Lansing, MI

Line: MSU by 5 (vegasinsider.com)
TV: BTN
Weather: 64 degrees, partly cloudy, wind 8 mph ENE

Depth Chart - MSU - Wisky

Injuries - Wisky.  Out - PK  Rafael Gaglianone; LG Jon Dietzen; RB Bradrick Shaw; LB Chris Orr; CB Natrell Jamerson. Questionable - LG Micah Kapoi; RB Corey Clement; RB Taiwan Deal.

Injuries - MSU.  None.  

STRIPE THE STADIUM!!!  EVEN SECTIONS WEAR GREEN.  ODD SECTIONS WEAR WHITE.

Wow, check out that injury list for Wisconsin, particularly on offense.  This is rough for a unit that had to come back from a 17-13 deficit to squeak by that upstart team, 0-3 Georgia State, last week at home.  Bucky Badger is hurting at the right time to meet the Spartoonies... but, Wisky seems to always bring their lunchpail when playing the Big Green.

Why in the good lord did ABC or ESPN not pick up a #8 vs #11 matchup?  Very odd, because it screwed up SpartanNation's plans for 'gating.  Instead, with a Noon kick, the ES is just gonna skate over to the PB for some common sense and meet up with the gang prior to the game.  So long as it pairs up with a scUM loss to Penn State, it actually might work out just fine...

Let's cut to the chase.  The ES wuz with Ronnie and Rick at the Peanut Barrel on Thursday when CNN's Ultimate Tailgate showed up.  It was pretty cool hanging with former NFLer Coy Wire (Stanford Cardinal, Buffalo Bills) We were put on the tube rebel-rousing about the food, the beer, and left the producers with a rowdy "Go Green Go White!"  You can tune into CNN Headline News' Weekend Express between 7 am - Noon, prior to kickoff on Saturday to see the ES and the PB in action.  Thanks, Joe Bell!

There's Joe Bell (far left), proprietor of Peanut Barrel yucking it up
with Mr. Clean, a.k.a. Coy Wire and the Ultimate Tailgate Crew...
A great visit, thank you CNNHL! 

ES Thoughts?  MSU is healthy, and was incredibly impressive at times taking ND to the woodshed on the ground.  However, if there is a strength of the beer-drinkers and hell raisers, it is their interior defense which is giving up 82.3 ypg on the ground, and just 3.3 yards per carry.  Meanwhile, LJ Scott and Madre London ripped through the Irish last week for 198 yards on 35 carries. Through the air, Tyler O'Connor played the best game of his career, going 19-26 for 241 yards and a pair of TDs.  He looked sharp, and added another 46 yards on the ground.  RJ Shelton came alive as his go-to receiver with eight grabs, but Donnie Corley (4-88) looked insane as the youngster with great hands.  Looks like a stellar receiving corps that will test the Badger defense. Overall, the Badgers are allowing just 261 yards per game.

Da Badgers benched their shitty experienced QB to start a redshirt freshman, Alex Horney-brook, who led the Big Ten West stalwart back from the jaws of defeat to UGA State.  That spells trouble for UW, in addition to all their injuries against a strong Spartan defense.  If we can keep the foot on the jugular, MSU should be able to press Bucky into some turnovers and keep them at bay much of the game.

Don't expect a lot of points in this game. Nearly everyone in human history is picking the Spartans to win this one... except for Brock (see below), who is busy drinking IPAs across the Upper Peninsula.

ES sez:  MSU 20, Wisky 17

Skooz (from PB), MSU 33-17; RGMIII, MSU 24-21;  Brock, WIS 50-0; Tom (PB regular), MSU 38-21

Milwaukee Journal Sentinel: MSU 21-16
Madtown Badgers:  Nick, MSU 24-17; Rayan, MSU 24-14;
FoxSports.com: Feldman, MSU 17-9; Mandel, MSU 27-20
Freep: MSU 27-13
LSJ:  MSU 27-19
DetNews: Charboneau, MSU 27-13; Chengelis, MSU 35-13; Wojo, MSU 24-10; Niyo, MSU 23-17
BTN: Dienhart, MSU 17-13; Merriman, MSU 27-15; Yarina, MSU 23-19
ESPN: Bennett, MSU 21-17; Moyer, MSU 28-20; Murphy, MSU 24-21; Temple, MSU 17-14; Ward, MSU 20-16
CampusInsiders:  MSU 20-14
Athlon:  MSU 26-20
MLive.com: MSU 24-10
CBSSports.com: MSU 20-16
Sports XChange:  MSU 31-13
College Football News:  MSU 23-20
The Oklahoman: MSU 30-19
Chicago Tribune:  MSU 23-20