Saturday, November 26, 2022

ES Preview: MSU v Penn State & Thank God it's over

Spartan players taking a cue from Elvis: "I'll be Home for Christmas"

Michigan State Spartans (5-6/3-5) at Penn State Nittany Lions (9-2/6-2)

November 26, 2022. 4 pm ET.
Beaver Stadium, Happy Valley, PA
Weather: 52, sunny

Sagarin Ratings: Penn State #5, Michigan State #55
Line Outta Vegas: Penn State by 19-1/2

It's impossible to win at Penn State, especially when your team loses in 2OT to Indiana because of boneheaded coaching and poor execution.  No bowling over these holidays. 

Thank God this forgettable season will be over soon.  Bring on Izzo and hoops.  

ES sez:  Joe Paterno 38, Michigan State 21.

Monday, November 21, 2022 Same Old Spartans? Tuck impersonates the John L Smith years

Thanks for the incompetence, Mel "I wanna be just like John L Smith" Tucker

Post-Indiana, the ES doesn't know where to start, other than the obvious:  Fire Coach Tucker for the incompetence we saw on Saturday in the loss to an 0-38-when-down-by-17-at-half-since-2003 Indiana team.  No, and that's because there's a simple reason. The ludicrous $95 million/10 year contract signed by the athletics department to hire a guy with little-to-no head coaching experience (ok, should we count one year of coaching at national power U Colorado as something?).  Problem is, two years into the fraught-ridden deal, MSU would be on the hook for the last 7 years of the contract.  Thanks to Matt Ishbia and the St. Andre guy, they agreed to pay half of the salary to hire him, but none of the salary (aka "Golden Parachute") to fire him.  So, MSU paying Tuck $66.5 million (last 7 years on contract) not to coach and sit on a sofa eating cheese puffs is a bit ridiculous.  

But, someone else should create to put some pressure on the staff to get them to get their head out of their arse and stop acting like John L. Smith with the "outsmarting himself" decisions, pep-down speeches, and halftime adjustment failures.  Clearly, it's not working.  Setting up for a field goal on the two-yard line with a questionable-at-best FG unit in a driving, freezing windstorm isn't exactly good coaching.  OK, Spartan fans, everyone watching, raise your hands if you were saying on the final drive "We gotta score a TD, I'm not confident in our FG unit."  Thought so, all of us felt that way... except of course, for coach Tuck.  Listen, coach, you gotta coach from 30,000 feet as much as from the field level and use your authority to make a little better decision for the team and the Spartan Nation instead of acting like this is the NFL.  Either get a new pair of glasses to see the reality on the field and make better decisions or fire guys like d-coord Scottie Hazelton who can't produce any consistent play in the defensive unit (your honor, just look at exhibit A: giving up gashing 20-to-30 yard runs to an Indiana QB after stifling nation-leading Illinois RB Chase Brown is irrational).  

It is painfully obvious that we Spartans were spoiled with Kenneth Walker III in 2021, who put the Spartans on his back and ran like wild to an impressive 11-2 record.  This year, coach Tuck followed the John L Smith stuff-the-roster-with-JUCOs script with his tapping the transfer portal ad nauseum.  Note to Tuck: it doesn't work.  You gotta recruit and develop talent, not spend your time trying to find once-in-a-lifetime lightning in a bottle.  

Unfortunately, 2022 year was the return of the "Same Old Spartans" and very much resembled an overcoached (lack of focus on fundamentals) and underperforming (losing record) transfer-filled Spartan team all year long.  This dud of a season will be the remembrance of coach Tuck's decisions which impersonated slap-yo-mamma John L. Smith (the L stood for "laughter" or "loser", your choice).  

Victory for MSU? Nope.  Same Old Spartans?  Yup.  Thanks for making MSU a laughing-stock again, the pride of averageness and incompetence, coach Tuck.  And Good Luck against Penn State, LMAO.  

Saturday, November 19, 2022

Michigan State Spartans hosts Indiana's Little Pink Hoosiers

Michigan State Spartans (5-5/3-4) vs Indiana Hoosiers (3-7/1-6)
November 20, 2022, 12 noon


Weather:  Cloudy, 27, windy = 17 mph

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #46, UI #93

Line outta Vegas:  MSU by 10

Land of the free... Little Pink Hoosiers for you and me, babe

Methinks with the cold windy weather, this game is going to be a challenge for both teams, and that means defense will steal the show.  While Sparty is having a sub-par year, there is a bowl bid on the line... and Indiana, well nothing's changed, they still have Little Pink Houses for you and me.  


This year, Sparty and Indy are once again dancing in the doldrums of mediocrity.


The way both teams are playing, it reminds me of how both teams fared in similar sitnts from average George Perlees-esque years, or par Bobby Williams 2002, or underperforming John L Smith (pick the year), or boring Mark Dantonio 2019.  Not really glory years, very ho-hum AVERAGE football.  

Today will be a ho-hum game between an average team and a perpetual wanna be "runt of the litter".  Harumph.  I'm a bit scared on Thorne throwing it through the air lately, some of his mid-range and short passes are just flat and off.  But, he does throw a damn fine long ball.  A few of those will make the difference in the game.  The defense has got to tighten up on the defensive line. This game will be closer than the 10-pt spread...

The ES is in Las Vegas and will tune in on the boob-tube. 

ES sez?:  Bobby Williams 21, Gerry Dinardo 17.

Saturday, November 12, 2022

ES Preview: Spartans host the Knights

Michigan State Spartans (4-5/1-4) host Rutgers Scarlet Knights (4-5/1-5)
November 12, 2022.  12 noon
Spartan Stadium. East Lansing, MI
Weather:  ccccccold

Sagarin Ratings:  MSU #42, Rutgers #105
Line outta Vegas: MSU by 9.5

Cccccc-cccccc-cccc-COLD Spartan Fans!  Huddle up!

ES sez:  MSU 28, Rutgers 17 

Saturday, November 05, 2022

Spartoonies take on #17 Illinoisie

The old days with Dick Butkus are back at Illinoisie. Go figure.

Michigan State Spartans at #17 Illinois Illini
MSU (3-5/1-4) at Illinois (7-1/4-1)
November 5, 2022, 3:30 pm ET 


Weather:  Sunny, 64, winds 11 mph SW

Sagarin Ratings: MSU #49, UI #22

Line outta Vegas:  Illinois by 17

Wait, Illinoisie is ranked?  What year is this, Butkus-esque 1964?  

This is the toughest game of the season for Michigan State.  After the scUM “tunnel fiasco” leaving 4 Michigan Staters suspended (and two defensive starters - Grose and our best player this year, Windmon), it will be a challenge for the Spartans to defend one of the nation’s best runners at the Illini in Chase Brown.  Ugh.  Top that off by the haphazard and underwhelming performance by the offense this year against the nation’s top-ranked defense, and that can spell trouble.  

Mind you, pudding-boy-coached Illinois has not played a heavyweight in its competition to date (beating Iowa 9-6 in a game that took football back 100 years; beating Wisconsin and Minnesota).  Is MSU a heavyweight?  Traditionally, yes, but this test will be foreboding.  The offense for MSU must get on track to have a chance in this game.

ES sez:  Pudding Boy 27, Tunnel Vision 14.