Michigan: "You officially suck"

The Sloth lays it on the line with his NEW "effing sports blog". Here's a sample with his take of watching Rich Rod and Michigan duke it out in the gutter.

"The net effect? Michigan has already lost Rodriguez recruits with the uncertainty surrounding Rodriguez, and is quickly pissing away the recruiting window to close on pending recruits with a new staff for the 2011 season. It is looking more and more stupid, and very publicly, for not having already fired a coach that everybody (even Mark May, for Chrissakes) agrees should have been fired, and for not having a new coach ready to step in and transition into the job.

Congratulations, University of Michigan, what was already a lousy situation (from your perspective, not mine) is even worse (or better). You officially suck, perhaps even worse than my beloved Spartans or any of my various beloved Detroit sports teams have ever sucked. Your football program is in the shitter, and you have successfully alienated some of your most-successful program alums (Harbaugh, Miles, among others)."

SIMPLY FANTASTIC. ES is all warm and fuzzy, thanks Sloth!

Enjoy Rich Rod and keep us laughing

Why is Rich Rod's firing being postponed? Lack of commitment from Harbaugh, and lack of being sold on Hoke from scUM alumni. Hoke's resume is less than impressive. Do you want a coach whose previous job was a clerk at Dairy Queen? Such is Hoke's resume re: San Diego State... In other words, who wants to be #2? Everyone knows JH is #1, and BH is #2. That don't look good.... Thus, postponement.

Let's be realistic. The problem facing the scUM job is the same as the ND job - who wants the headache? Get a life and be proud of your accomplishments, and don't get on your high horse thinking your shit don't stink. But not for the AA-faithful, who are bleached and polished so white and shiny, they blind themselves. It's a riot to watch reality hit the scUM faithful smack in the face, only to see them rebound again and again into the same scenario. It is tough to learn when you are blind, deaf, and dumb.

It's all a hilarious romp in wonderland.... welcome to Spartanland, Yellow Bellies! This is our world, and no surprise you've landed in the world we used to live. Enjoy the spoils, keep Rich Rod, and keep us laughing.

Rich Rod firing at Michigan is a mistake

Rich Rodriguez fired today at Michigan, reported by Fox 2 Detroit at 3 pm. My guess is Stanford's Jim Harbaugh will be hired by tomorrow. scUM AD David Brandon wouldn't fire Rodriguez unless he had someone else lined up. And, right after the Stanford game? Too much of a coincidence.

But, if Harbaugh ain't available, it might be this Brady Hoke guy the ES has never heard of down at San Diego State. That would be beautiful -- another noname, and from a non-BCS conference... HOPE FOR HOKE!

It's too bad. Rodriguez was the greatest coach in recent memory for the Wolverines. His style of play was perfect for the Big Ten. The ES thought his "You Raise Me Up" performance at the season ending banquet sealed the deal - he was quintessentially a perfect fit in Ann Arbor...

Incidentally re: Harbaugh, if the ES was a coach at Stanford or Cal and was offered the position to coach at Michigan State... "sorry" - the ES bleeds green and northern California is God's-own country, the most beautiful and fun place on the planet - the ES would stay at Stanford or Cal. Matter of fact, the ES hopes on getting a faculty gig out there sooner than later.... why go shovel snow for 5 months a year when instead you can enjoy warm weather, the bread-basket/vineyards/hoplands of the year for 12 months? Sorry, the ES would stay and one wonders if Harbaugh will, too.... (FYI - the SAME could be said for Hoke down at San Diego, except warmer with a better beach!)

UM: Keep Rich Rod and Appalachian values

The ES is here at the Peanut Barrel, in absolute tears laughing and talking to Joe about Terry Foster's column in the Detroit News about Rich Rod as scUM coach and his performance at the Michigan annual football banquet last night. Please, pray god he sticks around; he is Ann Arbor's answer to John L. Smith.

• "Someone described Rich Rod as a guy giving a bad speech to the bride and groom at a wedding. The only difference is the best man is usually tanked so he has an excuse."
• "This was one of the most embarrassing moments in Michigan football history. It is something Buckeyes and Badgers and Spartans will laugh at for years to come."
• "Usually, we see performances like this from Lions coaches when they finally realize they have no shot at winning."
• "After Rodriguez embarrassed himself and the program by playing "You Raise Me Up" at the annual football bust I would have asked the DJ to play "Hit the Road Jack."
• "A Michigan man? He looks more like a mess of a man."
• "And the weak and sniffling Rich Rod hardly looked like a Michigan man.

Let us be real... Are we at Michigan State the only ones who see the significant contribution this man, Rich Rodriguez, has made to the history of football and to the integrity of the University of Michigan? He has done no wrong, being absolved of all possible NCAA rules misconduct. He has improved the program from 3-9 to a resounding 7-5 powerhouse, in a matter of three years. Graduation rates on the team are not significantly worse. More importantly, he has instilled sound Appalachian West Virginian values into the culture of Michigan athletics - values of "spread and ready" and "shotgun" if you will... And, "he wants to be a Michigan man" - that is called loyalty... what more do you want Michigan faithful. Keep Rich Rod!

Charlie Weis fires himself; Fire Your Football Coach website update

Hilarious, as Charlie Weis has fired himself, "If they decide to make a change, I’d have to say I’d have a tough time arguing with that.... it would be tough for me to argue with that point."

So, it's that time of year - bowl bound or be fired. College football fans, the ES submits this list for your amusement. Here is a current list of "Fire Your Coach" websites for those NCAA Division I-FBS football coaches on the hotseat and in danger of being sacked.

• Arizona State: FireDErickson. Fire Dennis Erickson on twitter.
• Colorado: FireDanHawkins.net. Fire Dan Hawkins. Hawkins' Law: Any mistake that can be made will be made.
• Florida State: hireretireorfirebobbybowden.com. Hire, Retire or Fire Bobby Bowden: The Future of Bowden.
• Georgia: FireMarkRicht.net. Replace Mark Richt: Free Willie!
• Louisville: FireKragthorpeNow.com. Fire Steve Kragthorpe Now.
• Michigan: FireRRod.com. Fire Rich Rodriguez.
• Michigan: FireRichRodriguez.com. Fire Rich Rodriguez: Just kidding. We love RichRod where he is … in the losers bracket at scUM.
• Notre Dame: ChuckWeis.com. Fire Chuck Weis: Demanding excellence, not dreaming about it.
• Tennessee: KanKiffin.com. Dedicated to preserving the grand tradition of the University of Tennessee football and giving a voice to those fans who believe that the new head coach, Lane Kiffin, is embarassing the program.
• Texas A&M: firecoachsherman.com. Fire Coach Sherman: Please Save Aggie Football!
• Virginia: firealgroh.com. Fire Al Groh: I don't know when Duke became a stronger football program than UVA, but it has happened.
• Virginia: dontfirealgroh.com. Virgina Foosball wahooter.

Michigan State: Alas, a 6-6 season won't outdo the Spartan Nation which has one, too (though the ES is in strong disagreement): Fire Dantonio.com.

More on Michigan scandal. Video from Freep reporters

ES thoughts on the Michigan compliance violation allegations:

1. You'll never find anything, 'cause RR will shred the documents
2. If you did, nothing will happen because it's sanctimonious Michigan -- let us all bow
3. If by some miracle the NCAA does levy a sanction, it will be a slap on the wrist, because it's "all mighty Michigan"
4. The NCAA will use this as a reason to open a wider national investigation of strength & conditioning coaching and "volunteer" time, even though scholars and critics have been screaming about this issue for years, it pathetically takes it to happen to scUM for the NCAA to wakeup.
5. Cheating is cheating. While many programs may or may not follow the rules to the same extent, if one breaks the rules, it should be held accountable.

Video from Freep reporters on their investigation:

Freep on Michigan football breaking NCAA rules

Interesting dialogue out of the Free Press on Michigan football breaking NCAA rules relating to amount of time spent on strength & conditioning in the off-season. We will see what becomes of this, but in all honesty, this part of college football has been one of the least enforced areas for years - and NCAA rules and enforcement has been lax at best. Still, while the ES is no fan of Michigan football, the question is: how much of this is with a strength coach around, and how much is "voluntary." We all know that the amount of "voluntary" time put in by football players is far in excess to anything reasonable at Michigan and everywhere else in major college footbal. How much more is Michigan beyond the norm?

Seemingly, scUM is WAY BEYOND the norm, if you read a response by ESPN's Adam Rittenberg, who asked several other players. What is amazing is if players actually signed documents not to tell the compliance director about exceeding NCAA conditioning regulations. If that's the case, the documents will turn up -- but why have them sign anything? That's about the dumbest thing I've ever heard, to put the proof of violations in writing. HAHAHAHAHAHA....

But... let's get to the real point. What IS interesting is the amount that current players are willing to talk about this. There is seemingly no love lost by several (or many) of the players and their families with Dick Rod, and this is yet another tale of the amount of issues bleeding out of Ann Arbor relating to a poor relationship between the head coach, players, and the community.

You would have never heard this under Bo or Lllloyd Carr. Simply fascinating the unhappiness.

Yes, folks, Michigan football seemingly is up the creek without a paddle - and in real trouble. This is their time of glory, and they can welcome a nice dish of scandal and deceit into their new $300 million palace next year.

The ES loves it. Hilarious, the ES is roaring in laughter.